Massage Therapists and Relationships

[g***@yahoo.com]

Any married or partnered massage therapists here in a relationship
where the other partner doesn't give massage? I am having some bad
thoughts about my new massage therapist partner going out on calls and
am in desperate need of advice. Before I paint a more detailed picture,
I wanted to see if there was anyone here who would be in a position to
respond (it seems like this NG may be mainly spam and ads).

T.I.A.

[suzee]

Post by g***@yahoo.com
Any married or partnered massage therapists here in a relationship
where the other partner doesn't give massage? I am having some bad
thoughts about my new massage therapist partner going out on calls and
am in desperate need of advice. Before I paint a more detailed picture,
I wanted to see if there was anyone here who would be in a position to
respond (it seems like this NG may be mainly spam and ads).

Heh, you should see alt.backrubs.

Are you afraid for your partner, or don't trust him/her?

sue

[Chris Zakes]

On 11 Dec 2006 14:35:06 -0800, an orbital mind-control laser caused

Post by g***@yahoo.com
Any married or partnered massage therapists here in a relationship
where the other partner doesn't give massage? I am having some bad
thoughts about my new massage therapist partner going out on calls and
am in desperate need of advice. Before I paint a more detailed picture,
I wanted to see if there was anyone here who would be in a position to
respond (it seems like this NG may be mainly spam and ads).
T.I.A.

I am. I've been licensed for over four years and doing massage
full-time for over a year. About 75% of my clients are female. My wife
makes a great "practice dummy" <G> but doesn't really have the hand
strength or training to do massage herself.

An ethical massage therapist won't use massage as a way of soliciting
for sexual favors, and will stop the massage cold if the client starts
acting inappropriately. Presuming that's what your partner is, there
shouldn't be any problems. (If this therapist is *un*ethical, then you
probably ought to break off the relationship anyway.)

Ultimately, it comes down to trust--do you trust your partner not to
do something stupid or unethical? You probably ought to talk to your
partner about your concerns to see if you can come to a better
understanding of the situation.

-Chris Zakes
Texas

There are no dangerous weapons, there are only dangerous men.

-Sgt, Zim in "Starship Troopers" by Robert Heinlein

[g***@yahoo.com]

Hey Chris and Suzee, thanks for the replies.

I totally, 100% trust my partner and her intentions. I know she didn't
spend the last year studying her @ss off just to give some dude a hand
job. She loves MASSAGE and healing and I truly, sincerely believe that
her intentions are nothing less than honest and upfront.

I just hate the idea of some other guy getting to feel HER TOUCH. I'm
not worried about her ethics and I know she has the ability to set --
and enforce -- boundaries. We've talked all this through many times.
It's MY problem -- I feel I've earned the right to have her touch me
lovingly and I don't want to share that with any other man.

Imagining her hands on some other man's chest makes me uncomfortable.
Then her touching me later with those same hands. I can't handle it.

How can I overcome this?

Thanks.

[suzee]

Post by g***@yahoo.com
Hey Chris and Suzee, thanks for the replies.
I totally, 100% trust my partner and her intentions. I know she didn't
job. She loves MASSAGE and healing and I truly, sincerely believe that
her intentions are nothing less than honest and upfront.
I just hate the idea of some other guy getting to feel HER TOUCH. I'm
not worried about her ethics and I know she has the ability to set --
and enforce -- boundaries. We've talked all this through many times.
It's MY problem -- I feel I've earned the right to have her touch me
lovingly and I don't want to share that with any other man.
Imagining her hands on some other man's chest makes me uncomfortable.
Then her touching me later with those same hands. I can't handle it.
How can I overcome this?

Maybe we can explain it from our point of view. To massage therapists, a
body is a collection of bones and muscle with skin over it. Period.
We're much more likely to be focused on the `knots' in the muscles and
how to release them than the person, though of course we watch for
reactions to know if we're going too deep. That's a much different sort
of touch than when she touches you. Just because a therapist touches a
client doesn't mean they touch their SO/partner in the same way. Have
her give you a clinical massage the same as she gives her client. Maybe
you'll be able to `feel' the difference.

sue

[kenneth k. -- massage man 4 ladies]

Larry, you're absolutely right to be worried. I offer
FREE massage's (mostly sensual and undraped) to ladies,
but I've been on the receiving end myself. Touch can be
very erotic, and I can't recall the number of times that
what started as an innocent therapeutic massage ended with
passionate love-making. It happens.

And the reactions of their lovers/husbands/boyfriends runs
the gamut from indifference to violent attack and
everything in between. I don't like it, but I've had to
kill two men. I had one man offer to pay me to teach him
the art of seduction; I declined. Yes, some do call me
the Little Rock Lothario, but I assure you, I never set
out to take a new lover -- it simply happens.

in the end, it's not her touch on another man's chest you
have to worry about. If that's all that's going on,
relax. If you wish, I can relay your concerns to her...
sometimes these things resonate more when coming from a
disinterested third party. Drop me a line with her photo,
name, contact info, height, weight, and breast size.

Post by g***@yahoo.com
I totally, 100% trust my partner and her intentions. I
know she didn't
some dude a hand
job. She loves MASSAGE and healing and I truly,
sincerely believe that
her intentions are nothing less than honest and upfront.
I just hate the idea of some other guy getting to feel
HER TOUCH. I'm
not worried about her ethics and I know she has the
ability to set --
and enforce -- boundaries. We've talked all this through
many times.
It's MY problem -- I feel I've earned the right to have
her touch me
lovingly and I don't want to share that with any other
man.
Imagining her hands on some other man's chest makes me
uncomfortable.
Then her touching me later with those same hands. I
can't handle it.
How can I overcome this?
Thanks.

[suzee]

Post by kenneth k. -- massage man 4 ladies
Larry, you're absolutely right to be worried. I offer
FREE massage's (mostly sensual and undraped) to ladies,
but I've been on the receiving end myself. Touch can be
very erotic, and I can't recall the number of times that
what started as an innocent therapeutic massage ended with
passionate love-making. It happens.
And the reactions of their lovers/husbands/boyfriends runs
the gamut from indifference to violent attack and
everything in between. I don't like it, but I've had to
kill two men. I had one man offer to pay me to teach him
the art of seduction; I declined. Yes, some do call me
the Little Rock Lothario, but I assure you, I never set
out to take a new lover -- it simply happens.
in the end, it's not her touch on another man's chest you
have to worry about. If that's all that's going on,
relax. If you wish, I can relay your concerns to her...
sometimes these things resonate more when coming from a
disinterested third party. Drop me a line with her photo,
name, contact info, height, weight, and breast size.

Maybe you should consider *not* doing sensual massage for your safety.

sue

[kenneth k. -- massage man 4 ladies]

Post by suzee
Maybe you should consider *not* doing sensual massage
for your safety.

It's what I do. I bring ladies pleasure. It's my reason
for being, my purpose.

[Tom]

So your a prostitute?

Post by kenneth k. -- massage man 4 ladies

Post by suzee
Maybe you should consider *not* doing sensual massage
for your safety.

It's what I do. I bring ladies pleasure. It's my reason
for being, my purpose.

[Xoinx]

Let's see a show of hands, ladies: how many of you think that this guy is a
total dud in the sack?

Post by suzee
Maybe you should consider *not* doing sensual massage
for your safety.

It's what I do. I bring ladies pleasure. It's my reason
for being, my purpose.

[suzee]

Post by Xoinx
Let's see a show of hands, ladies: how many of you think that this guy is a
total dud in the sack?

Ummm, do you think we really care....?

sue

Post by Xoinx

Post by suzee
Maybe you should consider *not* doing sensual massage
for your safety.

It's what I do. I bring ladies pleasure. It's my reason
for being, my purpose.

[RobynLMT]

On Dec 20, 8:36 pm, "kenneth k. -- massage man 4 ladies"

Post by kenneth k. -- massage man 4 ladies
Larry, you're absolutely right to be worried. I offer
FREE massage's (mostly sensual and undraped) to ladies,
but I've been on the receiving end myself. Touch can be
very erotic, and I can't recall the number of times that
what started as an innocent therapeutic massage ended with
passionate love-making. It happens.

NOT FROM AN ETHICAL THERAPIST IT DOESN'T!

[j***@hotmail.com]

Post by RobynLMT
On Dec 20, 8:36 pm, "kenneth k. -- massage man 4 ladies"

Post by kenneth k. -- massage man 4 ladies
Larry, you're absolutely right to be worried. I offer
FREE massage's (mostly sensual and undraped) to ladies,
but I've been on the receiving end myself. Touch can be
very erotic, and I can't recall the number of times that
what started as an innocent therapeutic massage ended with
passionate love-making. It happens.

NOT FROM AN ETHICAL THERAPIST IT DOESN'T!

Try reading A book called "What Turns Us On"- real people confess their
most intimate and outrageous sexual fantasies. By Iris and Steven Finz
I think it is Published by Warner Books
Read the Chapter on 'Sex at Work' - Massage Therapy, use it to empower
yourself, setyour mind at ease and strengthen your relationship.
It is a work of fiction. But so are the tricks your weak mind plays on
you! Be strong or get out!
Massage Therapist, South Africa

[platerider]

without quoting the greatest sc if writer ever self employed folks are most
susceptible top to possible non tax benefits roll with it and if the roll
last to long stand up and breath air and settle it as real persons

Post by g***@yahoo.com
Any married or partnered massage therapists here in a relationship
where the other partner doesn't give massage? I am having some bad
thoughts about my new massage therapist partner going out on calls and
am in desperate need of advice. Before I paint a more detailed picture,
I wanted to see if there was anyone here who would be in a position to
respond (it seems like this NG may be mainly spam and ads).
T.I.A.

[r***@cox.net]

I agree with Chris and suzee. I do mostly work in injury recuperation and
prevention, chronic soft tissue problems related to work-related
stress/postural issues, etc. so it's not exactly "relaxing" massage in the
usual sense. I'm in a relationship with a great gal. She knows I work on
women and manages her jealousy fine. She *has* been at the receiving end of
my therapeutic massage work (for shoulder injuries) and *knows* the
difference between the work I do outside and the touch I reserve for her
alone.

It all comes down to trust, doesn't it? Granted we are in a profession that
involves hands-on work - but to a *licensed professional* that means WORK,
no less than that of a chiropracter, MD, dentist, RN, DO or any other
healthcare professional. If I had to find any analogy to a more familiar
relationship, the closest would probably be "parent", as the attitude I have
is just that sort of unconditional caring.

FYI, in states requiring licensure for massage therapy, any
sexually-explicit activity during paid sessions and/or occurring in a
licensed massage establishment is cause for immediate loss of license and
possible prosecution. It is treated as (and is in fact) prostitution, NOT
legitimate massage.

-Rich

Post by g***@yahoo.com
Any married or partnered massage therapists here in a relationship
where the other partner doesn't give massage? I am having some bad
thoughts about my new massage therapist partner going out on calls and
am in desperate need of advice. Before I paint a more detailed picture,
I wanted to see if there was anyone here who would be in a position to
respond (it seems like this NG may be mainly spam and ads).
T.I.A.

[Resa]

How would you feel if your GF was a nurse? Would you still be insecure
in your relationship with her and what she does for her profession? I
believe that the "issue" is how you personally view massage therapy. If
you viewed it as it should be viewed as a medical treatment that aids
the needs of the client, then you would not be having this problem.
Again, how would you view it if she was a nurse? Massage therapy was
the task of a nurse in the earily 21st century. Think about it.